Narcissism and Family Law

Narcissism is a personality disorder that can have profound and often destructive effects on family relationships. Narcissists can initially appear charming and convincing, but their true nature comes out once they have tethered themselves to you through, for example, marriage, a child , or a jointly built business. A narcissist keeps going and never changes. A narcissist’s behavior revolves around self-enrichment at the expense of others.

Upon divorce, a narcissist sees this as a significant threat to their image and control, which often leads to resistance and complications. When a person with narcissistic traits is involved in family matters such as divorce, child support issues, or access arrangements, this can complicate the situation considerably. It is essential to protect yourself and seek proper help. Narcissists are often manipulative and controlling and lack empathy, which makes legal processes challenging. At Law & More B.V., we understand the challenges involved and offer expert legal help to protect your rights.

How do you recognize a narcissist?

Characteristics of Narcissism in a Divorce

  • Narcissists always blame the other person for the divorce;
  • They show little understanding and empathy;
  • They do not shy away from conflict and can deliberately create conflict;
  • They exhibit controlling behavior;

General Characteristics of Narcissists

  1. They like to talk about themselves and often interrupt others.
  2. They do not take social norms seriously and see themselves as exceptions.
  3. They ignore other people’s feelings and turn situations around.
  4. They want to seem better than others and hide their true selves.
  5. They are charming but drop you as soon as they lose interest.
  6. They more powerful by making others insecure.
  7. They are easily offended, cannot take criticism, and react with anger or aloofness.

Checklist: Recognise a Narcissist

  • Has no conscience
  • Experiences mood swings
  • Is never satisfied and often jealous
  • Could ruin your job or business
  • Never has enough attention
  • Uses silence handling and manipulation
  • Cannot be alone and gets tantrums
  • Manipulates and cheats
  • Lies convincingly and creates arguments for no reason
  • Is self-centred and addiction-prone
  • Communicates poorly and uses children as pawns
  • Plays people off against each other and always blames others
  • Leave you suddenly and use you as long as you are useful
  • Has no values and strives for power
  • Destroys your emotional well-being

What happens to the partner who wants to divorce a narcissist?

When considering divorce from a narcissist, you may encounter the following challenges:

  • Exhaustion: the emotional strain is great.
  • Fear of the future: uncertainty and unpredictable behaviour cause anxiety.
  • Need for support
  • Desire to break free: you want to break the dependent relationship.
  • Awareness of difficulties: the process is difficult, but with the right help, success is possible.

The Challenges of Divorce with a Narcissist

Divorce is always a profound event. When one of the partners displays narcissistic traits, the situation becomes even more complex. Narcissists can be manipulative, controlling and often emotionally or physically violent, which significantly complicates the divorce proceedings. Narcissists may also make false accusations to win over the children or punish the other party.  Also, narcissists may use financial resources as a way to maintain power over the other party in the context of child support.

Our approach in legal cases involving a narcissist

Our law firm has extensive experience in handling cases involving narcissism.

Here are some ways we can assist you:

  1. Expert Legal Advice: We offer expert advice on your rights and the best strategies to navigate the complex legal issues associated with narcissism. We understand the unique challenges posed by these situations and can help you build a solid legal case.
  2. Discreet Support without consulting your ex-partner: We understand that sometimes it is better to keep your legal action discreet, especially if your ex-partner shows narcissistic traits. Therefore, we can also inform and advise you in the background. In this way, you will receive the necessary advice in settling your divorce without your ex-partner knowing about your contact with a lawyer.
  3. Protection and Support: We help you take protective measures against manipulative and controlling behaviour by the narcissist. This may include obtaining protection orders to ensure your safety and that of your children.
  4. Effective Communication and Negotiation: If it is possible to reach agreements by mutual agreement, we as lawyers can help. Research shows that a self-chosen solution to a conflict is often perceived as most fair. A lawyer can manage the consultation process and ensure both parties are heard. Our lawyers are trained in dealing with challenging behavior and know how to communicate and negotiate effectively with narcissistic individuals.
  5. Legal assistance in proceedings: Of course, there may be occasions when it is not possible to reach amicable agreements to settle the divorce. In some cases, a judge then has to tie the knot. We offer full legal assistance in such proceedings, vigorously defending your interests and seeking the best possible outcome.
  6. Collecting Evidence: We help gather and present evidence of narcissistic behavior, such as manipulation, abuse or financial control. This can be crucial in legal proceedings to strengthen your case.

How We Help You Through Clarity and Structure

  • Analysis of the Situation: We thoroughly analyze your situation to determine the best approach.
  • Drawing up a Plan: together with you, we draw up a detailed plan that considers all legal and personal aspects.
  • Discreet Advice: We give you discreet advice and support you every step of the way so that you feel well- prepared and your ex-partner does not have to know you are getting legal help.
  • Making clear and concrete agreements: to avoid manipulation and discussions in the future.

Our Expertise in Family Law Matters

At Law & More, we have in-depth experience and expertise in various family law matters, including:

  • Divorces: Supervising the entire process, including alimony and custody. More information on our divorce page.
  • Acknowledgment of Children: Legal guidance on recognition before, during or after birth.
  • Denial of Parenthood: Help with the legal process of denial of parenthood.
  • Custody and Adoption: Support in obtaining custody or adoption proceedings.
  • Removal and Supervision: Legal assistance in situations of removal or supervision.
  • Mediation and Alternative Dispute Resolution: Strive for amicable solutions to avoid lengthy proceedings and reduce stress.

Narcissism in Other Areas of Law

Although narcissism is often most visible in family law cases, it can also play a role in other areas of law, some examples of areas of law in which narcissism can play an even greater role:

  • Employment law: Narcissistic employers or colleagues can create a hostile work environment, leading to problems such as bullying, discrimination or wrongful dismissal. We help you protect your rights and take appropriate legal action.
  • Contract law: In business relationships, narcissists may try to manipulate or break contractual agreements. We provide legal support to ensure that contracts are correctly followed and your business interests are protected.


Dealing with narcissism in family law and other legal matters can be extremely challenging and emotionally taxing. At Law & More, we understand the complexity of these situations and are ready to support you with expert legal advice and effective legal strategies.

Are you embroiled in a legal issue with a narcissist? We offer you personal and committed support. Would you like to know more about your rights and how we can help you? If so, please get in touch with us. Our team of experienced lawyers is ready to assist you.

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