Marriage or cohabitation with a partner from abroad

Marriage or cohabitation with a partner from abroad leads to very different legal positions in the Netherlands. Marriage and a registered partnership create rights by operation of law: a shared estate under the limited community of property, a statutory inheritance claim, an automatic partner pension in most schemes and a residence permit route in which you no longer have to prove that the relationship is durable. Unregistered cohabitation creates almost nothing automatically. Every protection you want has to be built yourself, through a cohabitation agreement, a will, a pension registration and a power of attorney.

What the choice actually changes

Dutch law knows three ways of formalising a relationship, and only two of them are recognised by the state. Marriage (huwelijk) and the registered partnership (geregistreerd partnerschap) are civil-status changes: the registrar records them in the Personal Records Database, and from that moment a long list of statutory rules applies to you whether you have read them or not. Unregistered cohabitation is not a civil status at all. Living together for twenty years, sharing a mortgage and raising children does not, by itself, make you each other’s heir, each other’s pension beneficiary or each other’s legal representative.That distinction matters far more when one partner comes from abroad, because a third party is now involved in your private life: the Immigratie- en Naturalisatiedienst (IND). Immigration law asks for documentary certainty, and a civil-status record supplies it in a way that a shared electricity bill does not.The comparison below sets out the immediate differences. It is a starting point rather than the whole picture, because several of these rules can be varied by contract.

Marriage, registered partnership and cohabitation compared

Legal aspect	Marriage / registered partnership	Unregistered cohabitation
Residence permit	The certificate proves the relationship; no separate durability test.	You must show a durable and exclusive relationship and sign a relationship declaration.
Property and debts	Limited community of property by default; excluded or varied by prenuptial or partnership conditions.	Nothing is shared automatically; only what a cohabitation agreement or joint ownership creates.
Inheritance	Statutory heir; under the statutory division the survivor receives all assets.	Not an heir at all; a notarial will is the only route.
Partner pension	Usually recognised by the scheme without further action.	Only after registering the partner with the fund, often on the basis of a notarial agreement.
Parenthood and authority	The spouse or registered partner is the legal parent by law and holds parental authority.	Acknowledgement is needed; an acknowledgement made on or after 1 January 2023 also confers joint authority.
Ending it	Marriage ends only through a court divorce procedure; a partnership without minor children can be ended out of court.	Ends without any formality, which is precisely the risk if nothing was agreed.

The trade-off is not freedom against security. It is a choice between a statutory package you did not write and a private package you have to write yourself, in front of a civil-law notary, before you need it.

How your status affects a Dutch residence permit

Residence permit application for a partner from abroad

For a partner from outside the EU, marriage removes one hurdle from the residence application: the proof that the relationship is durable. Everything else stays the same. The sponsor still has to meet the income requirement, the partner still needs a provisional residence permit in most cases, and both partners must be at least twenty-one years old.The first question is nationality, not relationship form. A partner who holds the nationality of an EU or EEA member state or of Switzerland does not need a residence permit at all. Freedom of movement covers them; they register with the municipality if they intend to stay longer than four months, and their right of residence follows from EU law rather than from your relationship. The same is true, in a different way, for a Dutch national’s partner who has previously exercised free movement rights elsewhere in the Union.For everyone else the route runs through the IND. In most cases the partner needs a provisional residence permit, the machtiging tot voorlopig verblijf (mvv), which is applied for together with the residence permit itself in a single combined procedure. The sponsor in the Netherlands normally files it here. The IND has a statutory decision period of ninety days, which it may extend; since 15 April 2025 there is no longer a penalty payment for late decisions in immigration matters, so a delay has to be addressed through an appeal against failure to decide rather than through a claim for money.

What the sponsor has to prove

Three requirements carry the file. The first is income. The sponsor must earn at least the statutory minimum wage including holiday allowance, and that income must be sustainable, which normally means an employment contract still running for at least twelve months from the date of the application, or an equivalent period of demonstrable self-employed income. The amount itself is fixed twice a year, on 1 January and 1 July, and published by the government, so always check the figure applicable on the day you apply rather than a figure quoted in an article.The second is the relationship. A marriage certificate or partnership certificate settles it. Unmarried partners have to show a durable and exclusive relationship and both sign a relationship declaration in which they confirm that they will live together and are not in another relationship. In practice the IND looks at joint registration at one address, a joint mortgage or tenancy, shared accounts and a coherent history. There is no fixed minimum number of years, but a relationship of a few months with no shared life is regularly refused.The third is civic integration abroad. Many partners must pass the basic civic integration examination at a Dutch embassy or consulate before the mvv is granted. Nationals of a defined list of countries are exempt, as are Turkish nationals under the EU-Turkey Association Agreement and people who cannot take the exam for medical reasons. Whether an exemption applies is a legal question worth answering before booking the exam.

Marriage is not a shortcut around immigration law

Marrying in the Netherlands does not create a right of residence. The registrar checks whether the intended marriage is genuine and may ask the IND for advice where there are indications of a marriage of convenience. A partner who married here while on a short-stay visa will in almost all cases have to return home and apply for the mvv from there. The order of events matters: the marriage changes the evidence you can submit, not the requirement to submit an application. Our guide to family reunification in the Netherlands sets out the procedure step by step, and the entry in our glossary on the residence permit explains the terminology the IND uses in its letters.

Property, debts and the limited community

Property and finances of an international couple

A marriage concluded on or after 1 January 2018 without prenuptial conditions falls under the limited community of property. What you owned and owed before the wedding stays yours; what either of you acquires during the marriage becomes joint and is divided in half when the marriage ends. Gifts and inheritances remain private property, whenever they were received, unless the donor or testator stipulated otherwise. Property that already belonged to both of you before the marriage, such as a house bought together, falls into the community.The practical weakness of this system is administration. Private and joint money mixes in a single current account within a year, and the partner who claims that a particular sum was private has to prove it. Keep separate accounts for private capital, keep the transfer records, and record in writing what has been paid from where. That is not distrust; it is the only evidence that will still exist in ten years.

Which country’s property law applies to you

An international couple cannot assume that Dutch matrimonial property law governs their marriage. For marriages concluded from 29 January 2019, the EU Matrimonial Property Regulation determines the applicable law, and its default rule points to the law of the state where the spouses had their first common habitual residence after the wedding. A parallel regulation does the same for registered partnerships. Couples who married before that date fall under older conflict rules, which can point somewhere else entirely.This is the single most overlooked point for cross-border couples. Two people who marry in the Netherlands and move to Germany six weeks later may find that German property law governs their marriage. The regulations allow a choice of law, made in the form required for prenuptial conditions, which for a Dutch couple means a notarial deed. Making that choice deliberately, once, is far cheaper than arguing about it during a separation.

Cohabiting partners own nothing together by default

If you live together without marrying, Dutch law treats you as two individuals who happen to share an address. Income stays with the person who earns it, savings stay with the person whose name is on the account, and debts stay with the person who signed for them. There is no maintenance obligation between you and no equalisation at the end.That is workable as long as both partners earn and neither gives anything up. It becomes harsh when one partner moves here for the other, gives up a career, pays into a house registered in the other’s name, or spends years running a household. Without an agreement, the claims available afterwards are difficult ones: unjust enrichment, an implied partnership, or a contribution claim on a jointly owned house. They succeed sometimes, but they are litigation, not certainty.The remedy is a cohabitation agreement (samenlevingscontract). It is not legally compulsory, but a notarial deed is what pension funds and the tax authorities look for, and it is the only document that reliably records who owns which share of the home, how the mortgage and household costs are divided, what happens to jointly acquired assets, and whether either partner owes the other anything on separation. Our comparison of a cohabitation agreement and marriage under Dutch law goes through the clauses in detail, and the article on property within and after marriage covers the married position.On tax partnership, one point is worth knowing and no more: married couples and registered partners are tax partners from the day of the ceremony, while cohabiting partners qualify only if they meet specific statutory conditions, such as a notarial cohabitation agreement combined with joint registration. What that is worth in your situation, and how it interacts with the tax position of a partner who has recently arrived in the Netherlands, is a question for a tax adviser. We do not give tax advice and will say so plainly rather than guess.

Inheritance, pension and decisions in an emergency

Inheritance and pension rights of a surviving partner

The gap between the two positions is widest at the moment when it can no longer be repaired. A spouse or registered partner is a statutory heir. Where there are children, the statutory division applies automatically: the surviving partner receives all the assets of the estate and the children receive a monetary claim against that partner which, as a rule, only becomes payable on that partner’s death or bankruptcy. The survivor can therefore stay in the house and keep the household running without having to buy the children out.An unmarried partner is not an heir. If your partner dies without a will, the estate passes to their children or, if there are none, to their parents, brothers and sisters. The surviving partner inherits nothing, however long you lived together and whatever the cohabitation agreement says, because a cohabitation agreement cannot appoint an heir. Only a notarial will can. For couples where one partner is not Dutch there is a second layer: the EU Succession Regulation designates the law of the state where the deceased was habitually resident at death, with the possibility of choosing the law of one’s nationality in the will. A partner who has assets in their country of origin should raise that choice explicitly with the notary. Our article on inheritance law in the Netherlands explains the statutory division and the compulsory portion for children.

Partner pension follows the scheme, not the relationship

Whether a surviving partner receives a partner pension is decided by the pension scheme, not by the Civil Code. Most schemes recognise a spouse or registered partner without further formalities. For an unmarried partner, nearly every scheme requires that the partner has been registered with the fund, usually on the basis of a notarial cohabitation agreement and sometimes after a minimum period of living together. Registration is the step people forget, and it cannot be repaired afterwards.Two related points are easy to miss. Many schemes now provide partner pension on a risk basis, meaning cover lapses when the participant leaves the employer, and a partner who joins the relationship after retirement is often not covered at all. Read the scheme rules, or ask the fund in writing, and keep the answer.

Who decides if your partner cannot

The picture here is better than it is often described. Under the medical treatment agreement rules in the Civil Code, if an adult patient is not capable of assessing their own interests, the doctor deals with a representative in a fixed order: first a curator or mentor appointed by the court, then a person the patient authorised in writing, and only then the spouse, registered partner or other life companion, followed by a parent, child, brother or sister. An unmarried partner who genuinely shares a life is therefore in that list.The weakness is proof, not principle. A hospital that does not know you may hesitate, and a family that disagrees with you can dispute your standing. A written authorisation, usually drawn up as a levenstestament (a notarial power of attorney for medical and financial matters), places you above the family in that order and removes the argument entirely. For a couple where one partner has no relatives in the Netherlands, it is the most useful hour anyone will spend at a notary’s office.

Children, parenthood and authority

Relationship form also decides who is a legal parent. A child born to a married couple or to registered partners has the mother’s spouse or registered partner as its second legal parent by operation of law, subject to specific conditions where that partner is the mother’s female partner. If you are not married and not registered, no legal tie arises automatically: the second parent has to acknowledge the child (erkenning) before the registrar, which can be done before the birth and is the cleaner moment to do it.Since 1 January 2023 an acknowledgement also gives the acknowledging parent joint parental authority automatically. That change is not retroactive. For a child acknowledged before that date, joint authority still has to be arranged separately through the central authority register, and many couples who acknowledged their child years ago wrongly assume they already have it. Checking your entry takes minutes and is worth doing before you need to prove authority at a school, a hospital or a border.Nationality follows parenthood, not the relationship. A child with a Dutch parent acquires Dutch nationality by descent, but where the Dutch parent is an unmarried father the timing of the acknowledgement determines whether that happens automatically, and for an older child additional proof of biological parenthood may be required. The surname of the child is also chosen at the moment parenthood is established, and where a foreign legal system is involved the choice can affect how the child is registered abroad. Our glossary entry on acknowledgement of a child explains the procedure.

The formalities: notice, documents and the notary

Whichever route you choose, the paperwork is where international couples lose the most time. Foreign documents have to be recognisable to a Dutch registrar, and that means authentication before anything else can happen. Start collecting three months before you intend to do anything.A marriage or registered partnership begins with a notification of the intended ceremony (melding voorgenomen huwelijk of partnerschap) at the municipality where it will take place. The ceremony may not be held earlier than the fourteenth day after the notification, and the notification is valid for one year, so a date must be set within that window. The municipality checks identity, age, capacity and the absence of an existing marriage or partnership.The Dutch partner usually needs nothing beyond an identity document, since the municipality can consult the Personal Records Database. The partner from abroad normally has to supply a valid passport, an official birth certificate showing parentage, and a declaration of unmarried status or its equivalent from the country of origin. Municipalities generally want civil-status documents that are recent, which in practice means issued within roughly the last six months; ask your municipality what it applies, because policy differs.

Legalisation and apostille

A foreign public document is only usable in the Netherlands once its origin has been authenticated. For countries that are party to the 1961 Apostille Convention, a single apostille stamp from the competent authority in that country is enough. For all other countries the longer legalisation chain applies, running through the foreign ministry of the issuing country and then the Dutch embassy or consulate. Some countries are subject to additional verification because their registers are considered unreliable, which adds months. A translation by a sworn translator is usually required as well. None of this can be done from the Netherlands at the last minute, and a missing apostille is the single most common reason a wedding date has to be moved.

The cohabitation route

Cohabiting couples do not deal with the registrar at all. You go to a civil-law notary, who drafts the cohabitation agreement, explains what each clause does and executes it as a notarial deed. Both partners identify themselves; a partner who does not speak Dutch is entitled to have the deed explained through an interpreter, and the notary is obliged to be satisfied that both parties understand what they are signing.Use the appointment properly. The agreement is the moment to settle ownership shares in the home and the treatment of unequal contributions to it, the division of household costs, what happens to jointly purchased goods, whether either partner will contribute to the other after a separation, and the clause designating each other as partner for pension purposes. Ask the notary in the same session about a mutual will and a levenstestament; drafting the three documents together is cheaper and produces a set that is internally consistent.

What happens if the relationship ends

A marriage can only be dissolved by the court. The petition is filed by a lawyer, either jointly or by one spouse, and the divorce takes effect once the decision is registered in the register of marriages. A registered partnership without minor children can be ended without a court: the partners sign an agreement drawn up by a lawyer or a civil-law notary and the registrar records the termination. With minor children, a registered partnership must go through the court in the same way as a marriage. Our article on ending a registered partnership sets out that difference in full.For an international couple two preliminary questions arise before any of that. The first is jurisdiction: the EU regulation on matrimonial matters decides which country’s court may hear the case, on grounds that centre on the habitual residence of the spouses and, in some situations, their common nationality. Because several courts often qualify, the partner who files first can effectively determine where the case is heard, which is one reason not to postpone taking advice. The second question is applicable law. The Netherlands does not apply the Rome III Regulation; under Book 10 of the Civil Code a Dutch court applies Dutch law to the divorce itself as the main rule, with a narrow exception where the spouses have chosen the law of their common foreign nationality. Note that the law governing the divorce, the property division and maintenance can each be different, which is exactly why cross-border files need to be mapped out at the start.

Division, maintenance and children

On divorce the community of property is divided in equal shares, unless prenuptial conditions provide otherwise, and pension rights built up during the marriage are in principle equalised between the spouses. Spousal maintenance may be ordered where one partner cannot reasonably provide for their own support. Since 1 January 2020 the main rule is that maintenance runs for half the duration of the marriage with a maximum of five years, with three statutory exceptions that extend it: where the couple have a child under twelve, maintenance continues until that child reaches twelve; and for marriages of more than fifteen years there are extended terms for a recipient who is close to state pension age. The amount is calculated on need and capacity to pay, and no reliable figure can be given in advance.Where there are minor children a parenting plan is compulsory and the court will not grant the divorce without one. In an international relationship the plan has to anticipate the realistic possibility that one parent returns to their country of origin. Relocation of a child abroad requires the consent of the other parent or the permission of the court, and taking a child abroad without that consent is child abduction under the Hague Convention, with a summary return procedure and criminal consequences. Address relocation in the plan while you are still on speaking terms.Cohabiting partners have none of this. There is no procedure, no statutory division, no maintenance and no pension equalisation. What you can claim is what your agreement says you can claim, plus whatever ordinary property and contract law offers on a jointly owned house. The end of an unregistered relationship is also an immigration event: a residence permit granted on the basis of the relationship can be withdrawn once you stop living together, and the partner concerned should take advice immediately rather than after the IND writes to them, because the options for continued residence depend on how long the relationship lasted and on the circumstances in which it ended.

What to arrange now

The practical conclusion is short. If you marry or register a partnership, decide before the ceremony whether the default property regime suits you and whether a choice of law is needed, and have any prenuptial conditions executed before the wedding day. If you cohabit, treat the notarial cohabitation agreement, the mutual wills, the pension registration and the levenstestament as one package rather than four separate errands, and complete it while both of you are healthy and in agreement.For the partner from abroad, keep the residence file in order throughout: report changes of address and personal circumstances to the IND, renew the permit in good time, and keep the documents that show you continued to live together. And whichever route you choose, check the applicable law question once. The rules of Dutch family law are workable; the problems we see in practice almost always come from a couple who assumed Dutch law applied when it did not, or who assumed that living together for long enough would eventually be treated as a marriage. It never is.

Frequently asked questions

The questions below come up in almost every first meeting with an international couple. The answers are general; the right answer for you depends on nationality, the date of your marriage and where you have lived.

What happens if we get married outside the Netherlands?

Getting married in another country is a wonderful experience, and it’s perfectly valid. However, for that marriage to be legally recognised here, you have to get it registered with the Dutch authorities. This means taking your foreign marriage certificate to your local municipality to have it recorded in the Personal Records Database (Basisregistratie Personen or BRP).

The most important step here is getting your documents properly authenticated. Depending on where you got married, your certificate will need either an Apostille stamp or a more thorough legalisation process. Without the right stamp the document will not be accepted, so your marriage cannot be recorded in the Dutch registers and you cannot rely on it towards the authorities here.

Can my partner and I marry here on a tourist visa?

Yes, it’s possible for your partner to marry you in the Netherlands while visiting on a short-stay or tourist visa. The key thing to understand is that you must demonstrate to the municipality that getting married is your genuine intention, not just a way to get around immigration rules.

You’ll need to have all the correct paperwork in order, including your partner’s authenticated birth certificate and a declaration that they are not already married. After the wedding, however, your partner will almost always have to return to their home country. From there, they can apply for the long-term residence permit based on your new status as a married couple.

Important Clarification: Tying the knot in the Netherlands doesn’t automatically give your partner the right to stay. The marriage is just the first step. The immigration application is a completely separate and mandatory process that has to follow.

Is a registered partnership the same as marriage?

For all practical purposes in the Netherlands, a registered partnership carries nearly the same weight as a marriage. Legally, partners have the same rights and responsibilities when it comes to things like property, inheritance, and spousal support. When it comes to immigration, the IND views a registered partnership exactly the same as a marriage.

The biggest difference comes up if you decide to separate. A registered partnership can be ended without going to court, as long as you don’t have minor children and can agree on the terms. A marriage, on the other hand, can only be dissolved through a formal divorce process in court.

What Rights does a cohabitation agreement give me?

A cohabitation agreement (samenlevingscontract) is a private contract between you and your partner. It’s a powerful tool, but it does not give you the same automatic legal rights that marriage or a registered partnership does. Its main purpose is to let you set your own rules for financial matters.

Specifically, an agreement like this clarifies:

How you’ll split household expenses.
What assets you own jointly and which ones belong to each of you individually.
What will happen with your shared home if you break up.

It provides clear financial insight and protection; however, it does not automatically designate you as your partner’s legal heir or next of kin. To ensure those rights, you must create a will and make other necessary legal arrangements. For assistance with these legal matters, contact Law & More for expert guidance.

Law and More advises international couples in the Netherlands on the family law and immigration side of these choices: prenuptial and partnership conditions, cohabitation agreements, wills and powers of attorney, residence applications for a partner, and separation or divorce with a cross-border element. If you are deciding between marriage and cohabitation, or you have already made the choice and want to know what still needs to be arranged, please contact us for an assessment of your situation. Our family law team can tell you within one meeting which documents you actually need.